Friday Morning in O.C.

Hello all,

Just sitting here at my old Starbucks in Costa Mesa enjoying a morning off and meditating on the Lord as my car gets repaired... Don't get me wrong, this is not my "old Starbucks" because I am a coffee fanatic (though I do like coffee); no, rather, it is my "old Starbucks" because I used to work here about 2 years ago. Besides a change in the staff, things haven't changed much! I see the same customers!

As I was reading Spurgeon's morning devotion, which spoke of God's unending abilities to strengthen and carry us, it dawned on me just how weak and feeble humans are. Think about it-- God created the universe, keeps the planets aligned, the stars in place, the world spinning; He keeps the oceans from swallowing up the land, the people from flying off into outer space... He feeds the animals, created cosmic laws and governs the universe without any problem... And yet, we sit here and think that He might have a problem helping us! How absurd!

And yet, we think that! We feel that, rather. We feel He is likely to forget us, to abandon us, to be unable to solve what "huge" problems we find ourselves in... We cry out to the Lord thinking that we need to beg and plead and whine for Him to take pity on us and help us... And that if He does choose to help, that His help may be insufficient.

This isn't a lesson on how we should not be so silly, because I don't think any amount of lessons could fix that. It is just that I have caught a glimpse of how silly and weak humans are. We are like little babies who can't yet control their limbs and shake them as we cry, yet we think that we are giant, strong warriors who can wield a sword and conquer the toughest foes. How goofy we are! What inflated opinions we have of ourselves!

But God has mercy, and loves us, even as we love our earthly children who hand us a piece of scribble art with the impression in their minds that it is a Van Gogh masterpiece worth millions. How grateful I am that He has such kind tender affections toward us silly, feeble, weak creatures. And that He Himself became one of us, suffering all the same emotions and feelings of helplessness that we are so prone to-- yet He knew the truth of God's strength and help and love toward us. And that He came to teach to us, that we might obtain the gift of that very same thing which He freely offers to us.

Praise God!
He is awesome.
Merry Christmas everyone! :)

What Can I Say...?

What can I say...? Not much is going on that's really worth writing about. I feel I must wait for some momentous occasion to make an entry here...

But life is very unworthy of a front page headline right now!

It's been "wake up, drive to work, work, drive home, eat, sleep, repeat" almost every day. I've been blessed to get to enjoy the fellowship and company of a family that attends my church. This past Sunday I went over there with Tom. Tom was going to jam with their son Perris and his friends, and I was going to learn how to feed the animals as I am house-sitting for them while they are away. It was a rad time! I got to learn how our church began, about their lives, and Tom and I got to share a few songs with them. And, we got to sit in a nice living room with a toasty warm fire! It's so chilly in my apartment! I think it's 54 degrees in my bedroom right now... I dread turning on the heater as I think it costs 10 cents a minute! Old heater...

It's a hard thing for work to absorb your life after a year and a half plus of having more than plenty of time for life in between work. It takes some getting used to I guess. I'm not too fond of it, actually... I wish it could change. If I could transfer to a different branch here in Carlsbad (vs. Escondido where I presently work) I would have banker's hours-- which would be awesome! And to boot I wouldn't have to drive 40 miles a day for work.

But God is good, and He so faithful to comfort me in all my afflictions (if they could be called "afflictions" hehe). I am glad that He's enabled me to be a witness at work too. I love to share the Lord with my coworkers, but I am so afraid of mentioning anything having to do with God at work! I tense up after every transaction because I want to say "Merry Christmas", but don't know if I should or shouldn't. So then I look insensitive and unloving because I don't wish them some sort of holiday blessing! Argh... Satan hits you on both sides! It's just not fair!

I may have an opportunity to move into a back-house at the home of this family at church (the Rowens). It would be so rad to live there! I think it would be rad fellowship, plus, I would get to go to a midweek Bible study at last (they have one at their home, but I can't go as I get off work too late... But if I lived there, I could probably just pop in when I got home without feeling too weird).

I can't believe it's almost Christmas... And 2007.

One year closer to Jesus! Yay!
Praise the Lord!

Well everyone, whoever you are who will read this...

Merry Christmas!
Jesus loves you!
Many blessings.

A New Development

Today has been a great day, and possibly may mark a turn in events in a situation that I've been dealing with for a long time.

I have been lonley and crying out to the Lord for a friend, someone who cares-- I've prayed, written a song, and cried... And today I was blessed with an answer to my prayer as a woman at my new church invited me to lunch with her family. She is a musician too, and plays guitar and sings lead vocals. She's a rad lady, and her family is awesome as well. Her husband is an elder at the church, and is a wise man.

It was totally an answer to prayer, very specifically actually-- I was talking with my Christian neighbor yesterday as she came over for dinner, and she asked me if I needed prayer for anything. I said, "a social life!" I told her that my favorite time, and actually the only time I've really ever had a group of friends to hang out with, was when I would meet up with my friends a half-hour before church and chit chat while playing hackey sac, occasionally go out to lunch after Sunday morning service, and go out Friday nights witnessing in Huntington Beach and elsewhere. And today I got to go out to lunch after church! Yay!

So the Lord has blessed me greatly. I am glad. Thank You Lord! :)
I am looking forward to the next chapter in this life.

Keeping the Focus

Philippians 2:21:
"For all seek their own, not the things which are of Christ Jesus."

This seems to be a plague in the curch today. The society in which we live constantly bombards us with the "it's all about me" attitude, even being so bold as to print T-shirts and bumper stickers with the blasphemous catch-phrase.
And how convicting is this verse even to those of us who seek not to live for ourselves!

Have we ever...
-Sought our own comfort over another's?
-Slept instead of praying?
-Skipped church to sleep or watch tv?
-Played games instead of spending time in the word?

Obviously, not all these things are wrong, but it's an attitude of apathy to the things of Christ that we need to guard ourselves against, the "it's all about me" mentality.
You see, we will not be on this earth for long. Our lives are but a vapor-- and thus we should live our lives with focus, drive, and purpose.

When we find ourselves in situations we know are temporary and will soon end, we tend to have a more relaxed and care-free attitude about things we don't particularly like or enjoy.
If a piece of clothing is uncomfortable, but you know you only have to wear it for a couple hours, you are more willing to bear with it than if you had to wear it all day or for multiple days.

If we realize this world is like the lobby to a great event whose doors are about to open, we will be more willing to:
-Talk to the strangers around us and encourage them about the upcoming event
-Be made fools (we won't likely see them again once the doors open)
-Be cramped and stuffy while waiting
-Etc.

Since this world is not our home, because Jesus could come for us any minute, we ought to live with a light-hearted and joyous attitude! Stop being so picky! Stop focusing on your own comfort and convenience! Stop thinking about material things!
Do... Focus on the needs of others, realize people are going to hell apart from Christ, DENY YOURSELF and take up your cross!

God blesses us here, surely, but we are to "seek first the kingdom of God and all these things will be added unto us! We focus on God, God provides, blesses, and guides.

Remember...

       In Matthew ch. 2 we read about the wise men who came to Jerusalem asking the whereabouts of He who has been born King of the Jews-- and Herod, being troubled at this, called together all the Pharisees and scribes to ask where the Christ was to be born. "Bethlehem," they replied, quoting Micah 5:2. Yet the Pharisees and scribes did not take the short journey with the wise men to discover the birth of their long-awaited Messiah.

       It is interesting to note that so many miraculous and bizarre events surrounded Jesus' birth: An angel announced His conception, He was born of a virgin, Mary and Elizabeth both prophecied about Jesus while He was still in the womb, Simeon and Anna prophecied over Him when His parents brought Him to the temple (to do for Him according to the custom after His birth), wise men traveled from afar (following a star) to come give Him exquisitely rich gifts, Herod had all the male children born around the same time as Jesus murdered...
       But the religious rulers, the scribes and Pharisees, who accused Him and railed on Him seemingly forgot all of these unusual, miraculous, out-of-the-norm events. They seem to have thought and acted as though He just appeared out of nowhere making audacious claims to be the Messiah of Israel.

       Have miraculous and divinely-ordained happenings surrounded any area of your life and yet in the passing of time you have forgotten them-- cast them off, laid them on the shelf even-- taking the present circumstances and interpreting them apart from the revelation God has given? Go back, and remember those things He has revealed to you, and incorporate them into your present circumstances. It surely would have done the Pharisees well to have done so!
       Had they remembered all the unusual, remarkable and miraculous events that occurred surrounding Jesus' birth, perhaps they would have taken a second thought to His claims. But as it was, their hearts were hardened and they could not perceive, as the prophet foretold: "Seeing they will not see, hearing they will not hear, for the heart of this people has grown dull..."
       Take the full counsel of God into account (not only in His word, but in what He reveals to you personally as well). Surely we must forget the past and press on, but that does not mean that we forget the hopes and dreams God has placed in our hearts through His word and His Spirit.

       Has God called you to a specific work, and yet the high hopes you've had seem to be but foolishness now as you take stock of your present circumstance, realizing that no grand or glorious thing has happened? You thought God had called you to a great work for His kingdom, and it seems just the opposite is happening? Do not lose heart at the present circumstances; have faith and hope in the work of God. Remember what He has spoken to you, and cast not away your first hope.

       "We had hoped He was the Messiah, the Saviour of the world..." But now He was in a tomb, wrapped in grave clothes, these last 3 days.
       It looked as if all was lost, all hope gone. Their dream had been shattered. This, they thought, was the end of all their hopes, the proof of their error and falicy: They had been wrong. But how? There were so many signs... But yet, He was dead. It must be-- They must've been wrong somehow.

       This is often how we feel and act. "God, I thought You brought me down here for revival. I thought You were going to use us. I thought You were going to do all these great and grand things... But I guess I was wrong. I must've been wrong. It's all dead, in the grave..."

       Yet His death was the goal of His life-- in order to bring about the greatest good ever: The salvation of all mankind! And on the third day, He rose again...

       How do you know, O man, that this apparent death is not but the goal of all that has been? That this apparent burial is not the one thing that will bring about the greatest miracle of all, the great glory of all that was foretold in times past?
       For death is but a mere shadow, and resurrection will come the third day. And though we pass through that valley, we needn't fear-- For He has not left us: He is right by our side.

Take hope pilgrim.

Death is not the end,

But the beginning.

Photo Mania

Welcome to my page!
Here are some pictures I have taken in the last little while.
Hope you enjoy.

Hope this one doesn't make you dizzy--

This is the view down the 2 flights

of stairs of my apartment

building. There's a beautiful

grove of trees to the left.

This was kind of a cloudy day,

hence the gray overtones

of the picture.

This is my little garden... Sort of!
Every time I have sought to keep plants alive in the past,
I have failed-- I had what I considered to be a "brown" thumb
(versus a green thumb).
But the Lord has blessed me greatly
and I have been able to keep these alive,
and they've even gotten bigger!
There's a mini rose plant, a rosemary, 2 basils, a weird purple flower bulb thing,
and some mums that somehow changed colors!

This is my piano which my mom left to me
when she passed away.

It's got a kind of '70s theme
with the plaid bench and all. It's great!

This is what I like to call "Soy Sauce Art".

Beautiful, isn't it?

I bet I could get $1 million!

Well, that's it for this time around.
Take care!
Jesus loves you!!

In the Beginning...

          Well, it's been almost a year and a half since my move to San Diego, CA. It's quite lovely down here-- the weather's very nice, I live not more than a mile and a half from the beach, and I have a grand view from my living room window.
          The spiritual condition of this place though is something less than to be desired-- it is a place in need of an outpouring of God's Spirit, and a great work of revival. That is the reason I felt He was calling me here to begin with: Revival.
          There have been good times and bad, and my story is really one of adventure and, even more, God's never-ceasing ability to pull me through any situation I may be in, whether it be His will or due to my own folly. I don't deem it too necessary to go back in time and tell my life story, though it may be interesting, but at some point I may allude to it!

          As for what the Lord is doing right now, I can share with You that He is stirring things up and I feel a great sense of hope-- One that I have longed for and feel I have lacked for some time now. He has renewed my hope in hearing from Him, in trusting that He is speaking to me through His word and through the body of Christ.
          For so long I have thought myself to be crazy, subject to conjouring up wild ideas in my own mind and calling them the voice of God-- though I sought and still seek with all my heart to not do any such thing! So, as you can figure, this can lead a person into a place of doubting that they are hearing from the Lord. But as recent as yesterday I saw the glimmer, the ray of hope burst through my clouded and confused mind, and I think I may have heard the Lord speak: And the God of peace will crush Satan under your feet shortly.

          You see, there have been many trials down here (and included along side me is my band-mate, as we both individually felt God calling us as a band/ministry to move to San Diego to do His work here). We have encountered legalism in the church which barred us from doing ministry, a heretical man whose words of deceit dripped like oil and who accused and blasphemed-- again, barring us from being able to minister-- and have also just had personal trials of our own of need and want and loneliness and doubt. It's been a wild ride at times! There have been many things that we feel, both individually and corporately as a band, that the Lord has spoken to us, and so much, oh so much, Satanic opposition. But I am eternally thankful to God who is always faithful to bring encouragement and hope in the midst of all such trials and opposition. He has never failed to speak hope into any seemingly bleak situation.

     So I am excited to see His work in these circumstances, to see one or any or all of the difficulties, prophetic words, and hopes that I have come to fruition. May this entry be but the beginning of His marvelous work-- and I trust it will, for His plans are good...